Unexpected Things

I was at my morning class today for ECE 102 - Intro to Lab Techniques. I was supposed to be home by 12.     Well for that class I need to do 60 hours in the childcare center hear and the orientation I found out was today at 1:30 well my class got out at 10:30 so I wasn't planning on staying the 3 hours since i didn't bring homework to do. Turns out they wont be able to do it again for me until next week and to get the 60 hours done i need to get started soon. So here I am at the school, ALL DAY again.

I didn't bring lunch.. I didn't bring ANYTHING because I wasn't supposed to be here that freaking long. So I'm starving, nothing to do and its only 11:30 I still have 2 hours to go. How annoying is that?

At least there is someone here i can help out. She is taking a class i finished in spring and needs help registering for it. So that will take a little time at least. I am excited to be working with the kids, but I dont appreciate being here for 3 hours.

Seriously I am not happy but on to something else.

My teacher was giving us names of places that were good that we could go to, to do our hours, and then she gave us the 2 she said we shouldn't go to. Primrose is a BAD place to go. Technically they are accredited but they own the company that accredited them. They practices they do, like the work sheets for 2 year old, although make some parents go "wow that's awesome" is NOT okay. You have to understand those types of things for that age group is not, and i repeat not developmentally appropriate. You should not having 2 year olds doing work sheets.  Their rooms are NOT arranged right, they dont have enough room yet they do not let the teachers rearrange their own rooms.

Not going so well in school...

So we had our first writing assignment in English today. was our first class and as the other one had we had a little essay we were to write so she could see our levels. It was only going to be 4 points. I've never had a problem with essays and my English teacher before loved my writing, just not my grammar, and I got a's on every assignment.

I get home and find a grade is already posted...

What did I get? a 75%! -.- I received 3 out of 4 points. I don't understand it. I'm sure I did everything the way she wanted, that I wrote it out and everything like I had before. I re-read the rubric and it said to analyse. I did, so in response my conclusion had my opinion in it but that is what it wanted!

So why did I only get a c???

This is not showing any good omens on getting an A in English 121 if i cant even get a great grade on the very first assignment.

Wrapper Cranes

So me and mom went to McDonald's today, the one inside Walmart, and while she was on the phone I was just folding my wrapper into a plane. When she started cleaning off her wrapper and started folding it. After a moment I realized she was trying to make a crane but couldn't remember. After both of us folding a little she remembered and... TUDAH! We had a crane.

Well my sister was still talking so I unfolded my wrapper and started making another crane. I got a little stuck but mom fixed it and then we had to. I really wanted a pic of them so mom decided to wait.

It was taking a bit so I took a napkin and started making another one, this one was smaller and I managed to do it all by myself. However while I was trying to blow air into it a loud whistle came out. I was trying not to laugh as mom just stared at me laughing a little saying, "Was that you??" I was like... I think so. Haha apparently my sister heard it through the phone as well.

Not sure how I made it whistle like that, but I eventually stopped  laughing enough to go back to blowing air and got it puffed up and we ended up with three cranes. I would have felt bad throwing them away, so I kept them after taking a few pictures. I just wanted pics but mom asked me if I was taking them for my blog and it hit me. Yeah! I could just put them on my blog and by-pass Facebook.

I sent the pictures off to my sister who just laughed saying "you guys are silly" but hey... at least we had lots of fun making them!

So at least we had a good morning today. I will remember it for awhile and I swear, every time I think or make cranes now I'm just going to giggle because of that stupid whistle.

Pot calling the Kettle Black

So just a bit of information first,

Dad never plugs in his stupid scooted himself, he always asks us to do it. Last night he asked mom to and she forgot. so when he tried to drive off to who knows where he couldn't get far.

I wonder if he will learn his lesson and plug it in himself now. Probably not but it would be nice for him to do something besides sitting in his bed all day reading or whatever. I like to read to but I don't lay in my bed to do it. I am up, I move around and I do things. I walk and go out he doesn't unless he can scooter himself there rather then walk or have someone drive him around.

Of course, if you drive him around you have to live with all his cursing and angry backseat driving whether at you, or the other drivers. I hate when he starts yelling at another driver for something he himself does when he would drive. It's like... really? You are going to yell and curse for something you do as well?

He is defiantly a pot calling the kettle black.

Anyways I guess he is stranded for awhile, which just makes me giggle. It serves him right for not doing it himself.

The Mail Theif

Let me tell you a story,

A week or so ago my dad called me to the door and handed me 2 things, one was 2 coupons for $1 off of a two pack of Pam spray, another I don't remember. Now he told me this "I guess these are for you, because a box came and said ----- on it; they really need to put a first name on it so I know it’s yours and don't accidently open it."

I thought, wow that's odd I'm sure they asked for my first name when I filled out the forms for the samples...

Today we were working in the garage to fix the door and when I looked over, wedged in a lot of other boxes so you can't see it, was the box. I was like 'cool there is the box'. Curious, I picked it up and glanced at it and the world stopped... right there, in PLAIN sight on the little address label was my full name. At first I thought, odd thing for him to miss that and then as I started to realize the anger hit me. There was no way for him to see the last name without the first. He thought there might be food or something interesting in there so he opened it and gave me the two items.

I cannot confront him because he will just lie about it so now I will wonder for the rest of my life if there was something else in there and he decided to keep it. I will never know what was in there, if it was just the two items he gave me, or if there were more.

This has escalated...

It has gone past the things he thought was spam that came for me, now he's opening boxes and things like that, that might be interesting or something he might want. If he things it’s a spam or a sample he's going to open it up and sometimes he's sitting there in his stupid chair waiting for the mail so I can't pick it up myself half the time.

Or I’m sleeping and it comes before I'm upstairs and he gets it before me.

How bad is it that you have to wonder how much mail has come for you that you've never received? That your own father is opening and possibly stealing things that have come for you. I am trying not to be angry or bitter. I know that if I let those angry feelings in they can eat my alive from the inside out but it is really hard right now. Mom can't even believe it, she doesn't understand why he would lie or even do it.

It's proving hard to just forgive him with each new thing he does.

Pissed Off, Annoyed, and Tired

I am tired. I had to get up early today because it was the day I volunteer at the public library.  Well dad invited the missionaries over and they are going to hang out and do the backyard... they had to push it back a few hours so guess who is the one person that gets to stay awake and help them out. -.- me!

I am tired, want to go to sleep but mom and my sister are both going to sleep so I get to stay up and help. The man that invited them over? HA! we all know he isn't going to do anything which is going to leave me tired and having to work. then after that at 7 the home teachers are coming over so I still can go to sleep.

Why is it that he invites people over and I'm the one that's going to be stuck with the work. He is the one that invited them over so why doesn't he do it?  I could just go to sleep anyways but that will just make him explode and I will be the one in trouble. I don't like the fact that i have to keep paying and working because of him! Why cant he do anything himself?! Why is it that i have to suffer a lot and give up a lot as well as other sin my family because he doesn't think of anyone else?!

I know he will tell a different story; I am just selfish and just don't understand how much he is in pain, how hard everything is. I'm tired of it. I am super tired and cannot take a nap because he invites people over leaving me and everyone else to clean and take care of it. Should be a law that says "you invite them over, you do the cleaning"

I want to take the easy way, to just accept the anger and the bullying from him for not helping but I can't. I can't handle all the crap anymore. I'm reaching the end of my rope and I don't know what I'm going to do if it doesn't end soon. I wish I had my degree and an amazing job that I could go off and live on my own and never EVER talk to him again. Sure I'd take to mom, i love her and she's understanding but i would never talk to him again, or see him unless I had to.

And when I ever have kids? HA he will only get to see them if he is still with mom. I'm not going to let my children stay with him, he will just work them to the bone and belittle them. So if him and mom ever get a divorce he wont ever get to see his grand-children either. Guess that's what you get when your an awful father.

He wont be able to tell me that I'm embarrassing the family then!

I agree, in an emergency we are all just going to have to die. I am majorly arachnophobia so... so NOT touching that button.

I did my volunteering at the library this morning, and as soon as I came home i printed out the biscuit recipe and started to work. before i could even make it i had to pull out the yeast and then scrub the counter top clean...

yeah it was really nasty to clean.

once i got it clean i made the biscuits and did the dishes i could while they baked. Hopefully they taste as good as when mom makes them. Downside to all this is my hands were yuckied up more times then i could count and now my feel hurt like crap. Pretty sure part of that is the bad circulation i have in my legs do to my Hypotension [low blood pressure].

I plain to just sit here on my but for a bit with my feet raised. I see no point in getting up when nothing really to do and my feet hurt this bad.

  

Ingredients

•     1 package yeast
•     1/2 cup lukewarm water
•     5 cups all-purpose flour
•     1 teaspoon baking soda
•     1/2 teaspoon salt
•     1 tablespoon baking powder
•     2 tablespoons sugar
•     3/4 cup solid shortening (recommended: Crisco) Lard for the brave at heart
•     2 cups buttermilk* or as needed

---

How to make it

•     Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
•     Dissolve yeast in warm water; set aside.
•     Mix dry ingredients together.
•     Cut in shortening.
•     Add yeast and buttermilk and mix well.
•     Turn dough onto lightly floured surface, knead briefly and roll out to desired thickness.
•     Cut with biscuit cutter, or a glass,  and place on greased baking sheet.
•     Bake for 12 minutes or until golden brown.

*to make buttermilk from ordinary, just had the 2 cups of milk followed but 2 tbls of vinegar

                  

Hahahahahahahahaha!

I like this quote, sometimes you have to go through a lot 'dying inside' to become someone better and reach another plateau in your life. Sometimes, i know, it feels like its never going to end, wondering what you can get from any of the trouble that your going through.
We all have out trials... sadly we end up with more then one. My biggest trials are my health and then my father. Two of my conditions cause migraines so i have to have prescription headache pills since nothing else works, well I kind of misplaced mine lol, but cant get anymore cause we don't have health insurance since dad lost his job and without insurance its $99.  So i have to make do with the stupid Excedrin.

At least one good thing is happening, in about an hour Prius Online is coming back as Arcane Saga!!! I'm so excited about it. I've been waiting for the game to come back since Gpotato [the morons they are] closed it down. Don't feel bad for Gpotato!! they closed down Seven Core to. They like to close down their good games but keep their yucky ones!

I'm almost dying inside waiting for Arcane Saga to go into closed beta. I want my Lon Femina back. But I can wait, I'm just praying this stupid Excedrin kicks in and relives some of the migraine before I can play the game, or its not going to go so well.

Now, what started this whole blog was my extended family tattling on thing is posted to my dad on Facebook  I started this blog so i could vent without being yelled at for it. They have unfriended me, so i was wondering today about stopping the blog but i don't think I will. I know my dad, he will find a way to figure out what I've posted now that his sister and brother wont be tattling. So i'm going to keep this blog so at least i can post in peace.

Don't feel all that well today, and by the way its been going its just not going to get any better. Wish i could just have a good day, no pain in my back and neck, no nausea, no dad just peace and quiet.  Maybe tomorrow will be better, but i'm not going to hold my breath. Not sure perfect days even really exist anymore.

And I have an ILL that should be turned in but i guess my sister ran away with the car again and I'm not going to be able to turn it in. Really hope they don't charge me for turning it in Monday.

Prologue: The Bride

In the elden days there were countries and cities. Filled to the brim with people, they were the depths of society. Things are different now; as the world fell the nations and countries of the past crumbled till they were nothing but legends. The cities that remained were sealed away behind massive walls designed to keep everything out. Only a single gate was created for each of the 13 cities, now transformed to the ‘compounds’, so those fleeing could find sanctuary within its walls.

Some would leave, searching for signs of any other survivors but most were never seen again and passage through the gates became forbidden except for a few personnel trained to counteract the dangers that resided out in the forest... the wild men.

The wild men were once just ordinary met, but once the world fell and separated a few were lost and left behind. No one understood why but suddenly they all massed behind a man that rose from the shadows preaching words of vengeance and hate for those that lived and survived within the cities.

Four compounds have fallen to their hands, bringing the number from thirteen to nine. It is unknown how they manage to get inside the compounds, but once they are there is no stopping them. They left the purely innocent alone though, until the compound of silver-mist was taken. A compound well known for being against violence, it was a shock when they were attacked, but that alone is not what cause the others to pull away in terror. Every last living thing was destroyed within those walls.

No one survived, except rumors that a bride, who was to be joined that day to her chosen, had escaped. Most though couldn't bare to believe the tales, that is until one snowy night a young woman in a tattered white lace gown stood at the gates of the compound closest to silver-mist. Was she the bride? it seems the answer was never to be found for by the time she found her voice her memories had escaped her.

*taken from my notebook for the story of Mae and Tahlen

Life with Bullies

I'm tired of it all, I cant put out my frustration on Facebook with little posts because my dad's side of the family run off and tell him and I get yelled at... I'm 'embarrassing' him and the family, he doesn't know why he doesn't turn off the internet right now, blah blah blah. So going to have to vent here and never post on Facebook again.

What happened to 'you can trust your family'? Apparently that doesn't apply to my family  You'r dad is a bully, constantly picking on you and believes EVERYTHING that goes wrong in his life is YOUR fault and you can't even post about it on your own freaking page -.-

I feel so trapped, I can't hold everything in and yet i'm supposed to cause everyone outside the immediate family things him a saint. Sure he weighs over 600 pounds and does nothing but lay in his underwear in his bed all day long, sure he had to get an electric scooter cause he's to lazy to walk anywhere himself, SURE he lost his job because he was to FAT to do it, but he's a saint and its all my fault,  I just don't understand how hard it is for him.

Whatever.

I'm done with being told i'm the problem to everything, that i'm just throwing 3 year old tantrums. Posting whats making me cry or upset? or something that i just couldn't believe like the steaks thing? That's a tantrum?

I hate family sometimes...